A Wife’s Role And Responsibility

By ANGELIQUE VACCARO

Help her husband

When God created Adam, He observed him and saw that it was not good for him to be alone (Genesis 2:18), and He gave him a helper: Eve. Only then, God said that His creation was very good! (Genesis 1:31) This means that before God created the woman, His creation was incomplete. The man needed a woman! When God breathed life in Eve, Adam was asleep; he did not know what God told her. They probably had a long conversation just the two of them, God must have given her important instructions… All we know is that Eve was meant to be Adam’s helper because Adam could not handle everything on his own. (The Bible describes God, the Holy Spirit as our helper so it doesn’t mean subservience or inferiority. (Psalm 30:10, Psalm 54:4, John 14:16, John 14:26)) This is a responsibility God gave the woman specifically. Adam needed Eve to be by his side to help him fulfill his responsibilities!

A wife’s role of helping her husband is one of her highest responsibilities. God designed a wife to help her husband become the man, the husband, the leader, and all that He intends for him to be. She helps him by encouraging him, partnering with him in his calling, she is by his side at all times; she lifts him up and speaks wisdom to him. “She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.” (Proverbs 31:26) Her husband needs her, he values her opinion and seeks her advice; he treats her as an equal. He welcomes his wife’s help and appreciates it. He confides in her and trusts her with his heart. (Proverbs 31:11) A wife who helps her husband is a precious gift from God to her husband, she is a blessing, she brings him good! “She is worth far more than rubies, her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life. (Proverbs 31:10-12)

Respect her husband

“However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:33) A wife honors her husband by respecting him and his position as the head of the family. (Ephesians 5:23) The respect and affirmation she gives him motivates him to fulfill his God-given responsibilities. A husband will thrive in confidence to fulfill his responsibilities if he feels respected and admired by his wife. Respect and admiration are two of the most powerful tools a wife has to influence her husband. “Through our words of respect, and admiration, we can help our husbands become the great men God created them to be, and in turn, we can have the marriages we fully intended to build. It will take patience, humbleness, and grace, but it’ll produce love, happiness, and togetherness.” – Tracie Miles –

A husband can fully become what God intends him to be with the help of his wife’s affirmation and devotion. With every great husband, there is a great wife! A great husband has a wife who trusts his judgment, honors his leadership, and respects his decisions. She affirms him for his efforts, she validates his hard work, she builds him up with her words; she is his biggest supporter and encourager. She shows respect to him both by how she speaks to him and how she speaks about him to other people and her children. The more respect a woman shows her husband, the more love he will show her. A wife who respects her husband is a happy woman, her husband takes good care of her and loves her unconditionally.

Submit to her husband

“Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything.” (Ephesians 5:22-24) Submission is often misinterpreted or misunderstood but the kind of submission the Bible talks about has nothing to do with domination, power of the husband over his wife, or the degrading and diminishing of the wife. Husbands do not make their wives submissive, but it is the wives who submit by choice out of love for their husbands.

The issue people have is with the word “submission”, they interpret it negatively. What if we replaced it with “sacrifice”, “respect”, or “love”? Or by this verse that seems appropriate: “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:13) What submission in marriage really means is to put our spouse first, meet their needs, choose to love them unconditionally, and lay down our own life for them. “A wife who chooses to take an attitude of submission towards her husband is a wife who has a heart of being supportive of her husband. She does so because she chooses to. In choosing to support her husband she is empowering him to have the self-respect he needs. He will develop into the kind of man who accepts his role and responsibilities in the home. He will seek to carry out his God-ordained position of protecting, providing for and leading his family.” – Cornerstone Marriage & Family Ministries, The Biblical Meaning of Submission In Marriage for Wives – When husband and wife love each other, they will care and put their spouses interests before their own. It is a heart attitude and a reciprocity-attitude of giving and receiving out of love. It is this simple!

Fulfill her husband sexually

Sexual expression is a beautiful gift from God that husband and wife are to enjoy together. Wives are required to meet the needs of their husbands as husbands are to their wives. “The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.” (1 Corinthians 7:4) Sexual intimacy is a powerful force, it leads to a stronger and more connected marriage. A wife who seeks to fulfill her husband’s sexual needs will have a husband who is totally satisfied in her and is willing to return the favor! “A sexually fulfilled husband will do anything for you.” – Dr. Kevin Leman, Sheet Music – It also results in a happier, healthier marriage.

Sex is something a wife alone can give to her husband and vice versa, so it is essential to understand this need and make it a priority. A wife who attends to her husband’s sexual needs and understands the importance of fulfilling her duty blesses her husband and protects him from outside temptations. A husband who is sexually satisfied in his wife has eyes and thoughts for her alone. He honors her as much as she honors him, they both honor their marriage covenant. It does not mean that the wife must be used by her husband as he pleases, or accept everything he asks. It is more about giving and receiving in love, respecting each other’s boundaries, and fully enjoy God’s gifts together as one… Sexuality is about treasuring each other and enjoying each other in the most beautiful way.

Build a pleasant home

God said “Be fruitful and multiply.” (Genesis 1:28) God gave the woman the sacred role of being a carrier of life. One of her primary responsibilities is to have children, make sure they are nurtured, well behaved, and taught to serve and honor God. She builds a pleasant home for her family by creating and maintaining a peaceful atmosphere. She makes sure her responsibilities in the home and with the children are not neglected. “The wise woman builds her house, but with her own hands the foolish one tears hers down.” (Proverbs 14:1) Her home is a holy place filled with the Holy Spirit’s presence. She praises God all day and prays continuously. She keeps her marriage harmonious so the family lives together in unity. She represents the authority when her husband is not here and she makes sure her husband feels welcomed when he returns. “She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.” (Proverbs 31:27) She finds joy in working hard in her home, she does not complain and is not afraid to ask for help when she needs it. She sacrifices a lot for the well-being and happiness of her family, she meets everyone’s needs before her own. She is the first to rise in the morning and the last to go to sleep at night. God gives her grace, she relies on Him at all times. He is her source of comfort and strength; she fully trusts God and her husband, she does not fear the future. “She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future.” (Proverbs 31:25) She is a passionate intercessor, a faithful servant, and a prayer warrior. She’s a woman of strength and integrity. She is a devoted wife and mother, her children and husband call her blessed. “Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.” (Proverbs 31:28)

Love her husband

“Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.” (Titus 2:4-5) Loving is the greatest of commandment. It is not an option, we must love each other! “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another.” (John 13:34) Since marriage is based on a foundation of love, both spouses must love each other and show their love for one another daily. A wife will show love to her husband by doing all the things listed above! To love her husband means to respect and honor him, to encourage, trust, and support him. Loving means to submit to one another, to care for each other; to sacrifice, to serve, and to give… A wife who loves her husband is kind, patient, faithful, understanding. A loving wife is a precious treasure, her husband values her worth, he cherishes her. “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” (Proverbs 18:22)