How To Minister Through Our Marriage

By ANGELIQUE VACCARO

 

“Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing.” (1 Thessalonians 5:11)

All married couples need encouragement and practical tools to help them navigate and strengthen their marriage. Every couple is unique and writes their own story, but they need each other’s support, and prayers to build a solid foundation and grow in the right direction. Each person takes a different path, but they join each other in the middle with the same goal: to have a successful marriage! 

There is no “instruction manual” on marriage, but by seeking other couples’ knowledge and experience, newer couples will be more informed and prepared for marriage and the different seasons and challenges they will encounter. They will be ready to face them with confidence instead of being surprised and discouraged. They will be equipped for a better marriage and this is what every couple is craving for in their own marriage. Couples are looking for the truth about what real marriage looks like, how to do marriage well, and most importantly, how to succeed. They want to hear real-life stories from people who have already gone through many years of marriage and prospered. They are looking for the keys to the secrets of a lasting and happy marriage, helpful practices, tips and advice they can apply to their marriage.

To find answers, there are no better people to go to than others who have a passion for marriage. People eager to invest in other couples’ lives by sharing their wisdom and providing their support. Pass on things they learned from their own marriage and anything else that will help other couples’ marriages. 

People who desire to help other marriages often don’t know where to begin. Here are a few, simple ideas for making a difference in the marriages of other couples.

 

Lead a small group in your home

Leading a small group for younger, married couples with our spouse is an amazing opportunity to minister to younger couples who are longing for spiritual nourishment and connection with other married couples. Leading a group of friends gives you the freedom to lead the group as you would like. There are many marriage resources like books, studies, and online programs available for couples’ groups. You can do Bible studies, share from your own marriage experience, ask an older couple to share their marriage experiences, focus on particular topics all done within the context of a small group discussion. Doing all of this on a foundation of prayer is essential, praying for one another, encouraging, and building one another up. 

An alternative would be to lead a couples’ group through one’s church. This may require some additional training, but this is an excellent way to reach out to more couples within the church, learn from other leaders in one’s church.

Whatever the option we choose, the goal of leading a small group is helping couples succeed with their marriages.

 

Meet regularly with other couples

Meeting with other couples is such a blessing to our marriage! My husband and I meet once a month with a few other couples to talk about marriage. Each couple takes turn picking a topic to talk about and leading the conversation. This is so enriching and refreshing, because we all have different points of view and there is so much to learn from one another. It is very interesting listening to what everyone has to say! We really feel like we are not alone and that we all go through similar seasons of our marriage which is reassuring and encouraging for everyone. In our group, we know we can talk about anything, because it is a safe place. There is no judgment or condemnation, because of the trust we’ve built with one another. We receive support through our friends’ prayers, love, and involvement in our lives. We always leave our meetings filled with hope and grace. Our friendships are precious, and we treasure every one of them. We feel truly blessed to have such amazing friends to share life with!

 

Start a marriage ministry through a website

Promoting marriage needs to include outreach not only to married couples, but also dating couples, engaged couples, single people, and young people who need encouragement and inspiration for their lives. This may involve building a website and partnering with other churches to share our vision for marriage all over the globe! It is a way to equip, encourage, and strengthen individuals, marriages, and families, by providing specific marriage advice, teaching on the foundation and purpose of marriage. To minister effectively to everybody who visits, the website is a resource platform that offers different materials people can choose from according to their particular needs. Online classes, Bible studies, and enrichment program opportunities; useful information, real-life stories or information on marriage conferences, events, seminars, and retreats. A website offers endless options and opportunities for us to engage and bless many people.

 

Teach a pre-marriage class

Most of the time, engaged people prepare more for their wedding than for marriage itself. Once they are married, they are surprised to face difficulties so quickly and don’t know how to deal with them, because they were not well equipped from the very beginning. If we are married, have a healthy marriage, and wish to provide guidance and input to these younger couples, we can teach a pre-marriage class in our home or through our church and follow specific courses and programs. The goal of this class is to help engaged couples get ready for marriage by teaching them God’s purposes and purposes for marriage and giving them the foundation they need to have a good start in their life together. We can teach them the skills and behaviors that will help them build and maintain a strong, happy marriage. We can be a support system for them and encourage them during this important time of engagement and embarking on the marriage adventure!

 

Take a younger couple under your wings 

In Congolese culture, young couples who are ready for marriage, choose an older married couple called “godparents” to mentor them before and after their wedding. These “godparents” are not necessarily close friends with them in the beginning but rather people the young couples admire and see as an example for their marriage. The “godparents” guide and encourage the young married couples. They are neutral listeners who provide help and support and act as spiritual counselors and advisors. They help the couples grow in their faith, motivate them to improve their marriages, and bring practical life-changing advice to build and maintain a healthy marriage in the future.

 

Couples with a heart for mentoring other couples can become “godparents” to couples who desperately need help building a solid marriage from the start. The vision behind mentoring is to bless couples and be a gift to them through one’s own marriage. We want to see marriages blessed so they can be a blessing to others. We want to see successful marriages so they can be an example of hope to others. We want to see God’s hand in their marriage, so they can be a reflection of His love in and through His people, His church!